Written in thought of a very specific person. Most likely this is not you. I am glad that it is not.

So i appologize for all that I am, and all that I did to you. Even when I didn't realize what I was doing that needed to be appologized for, and you still need to shoot me down? Maybe this is just me, but I do not understand some people in this world. Is this me trying to get the last word, I don't think so. I think it's me trying to make sense of this situation in a way that is impossible for you to take notice of, so that I can avoid making you feel as though you need to display your dominance since you already proved that to me.

I still don't fully understand how you make me into a submissive person, I suppose it is out of fear of what circumstances may come of a continuation of this pointless argument. I suppose I fear that this may bring up issues that are burried away deep down in a place inside of me I have tried to forget about for such a long time, that without the success I crave for, it's slowly becomes another monotonis routine.

But I suppose that no matter how much self reflection I could indulge in, none of it could ever explain the way you acted towards me. The completely written out argument that is in place for those who are looking for it can find. Maybe I should not be concerned as to why, but simply be concerned with whether i was right or not. But that still wouldn't help my curiosity in any way.

So I really wish I could ask you as to why you reacted the way you did, maybe I could understand myself. Maybe I could only understand you. I don't think any of this is possible though without continuing your anger towards me. I suppose I can only hope that patience can take a hold of you, and that at some point when today has become the past, and we are both able to see this situation with 20/20 vision, you will enlighten me as to what I did to cause this, and how I should avoid these kinds of things with you in the future.

I suppose the reason I'm writting this is so that perhaps if someone is feeling the same way I am, due to a similar situation, they'll be able to see that someone else has gone through that before. And that we are not alone in our experinces.